Ask Paarull!
By Paarull Bakshi
If you have a question about your relationship that bothers you and you don’t know who to ask, the LINK has you covered. Ask Paarull at [email protected]!
I moved to Canada about 5 years ago from Jalandhar, India. From when I moved here first, I was in love with a girl here who I met online. She was very nice to me and we talked for two years and were kind-a in a relationship. I decided to move here for her so that we could be together! But when I moved here, I found her to be something completely different than I had thought of her. She already had a boyfriend and was even living with him, she still told me she is in love with me and being stupid I believed her. Even though she lived with another man, I decided to be with her. She told me that she was living with that guy just because she felt bad for him, I believed her again. She asked me to pay her rent as she said that she didn’t have any money, I gave her $10,000 to pay her rent for a few months. Then I ended up paying her cellphone bill, buying her clothes as we would often go shopping and even go out to eat often. I would always the bill which I didn’t mind as I thought that I was in love with her and she was in love with me. After 6 months of me being in Vancouver, I asked her to please move out from her place where she stayed with that guy who was her boyfriend or ex-boyfriend, I don’t know. She kept telling me that she would but she really kept delaying this matter for months. One day when I was waiting to pick her up from her house, a neighbour of hers asked me who I was waiting for and so I told him her name. He was like y ashes a nice girl and I agreed and then he said that her husband is also very nice and they’ve all gone out for dinners many a times. I thought I didn’t hear this correctly so I asked him again about her marital status and he was like yes that couple is married. I was in utter shock and didn’t know how to react. When she came outside, I asked her if she was married to the man that she lives with and at first she said no but then she started crying and told me that she was married to him but also loved me. I believed her again! I know I may be stupid But I guess we all make mistakes sometimes. We kept dating and one day she asked me for $25,000 because she said that she needed to pay for her Mom’s operation in India, I belong to a well to do family in India so I lent her that money. After this, I went away for a few days to Calgary. When I came back, I called her but she didn’t answer her phone and I couldn’t get a hold of her for days. I went to her house and rang the doorbell many times then I saw her neighbour again who informed me that the couple living in that house have sold the house and moved to England!!!!!! I was in shock and at this point I moved to a different country for a girl who I thought loved me, by now had given her more than $30,000 and given her over 3 years of my time. I was stupid and immature and didn’t know what I was doing. I have not dated for more than 4 years now and have completely lost faith in girls, what should I do?
Well Dear, whatever happened to you was unexpected and not something that any of us can imagine. Please don’t call yourself stupid as this could’ve happened to anyone and yes when we’re in love we tend to make decisions that we have no control over. We let our emotions guide us and this is the case most of the time. Whatever happened has just now happened and there is absolutely nothing that you can do about this. In your case, money, confidence, and faith was lost and you have all the reasons to be like this. Please don’t lose hope in love as you know there are plenty of nice women out there. Just take a chance and meet new people and trust me you will forget everything once you find that perfect girl! I hope it all works out for you and I wish you the best XOXO Paarull
If you have a relationship question that you’d like to share then – Ask Paarull at [email protected]!
