Ask Paarull!
By Paarull Bakshi
If you have a question about your relationship that bothers you and you don’t know who to ask, the LINK has you covered. Ask Paarull at [email protected]!
We live in a world where we give many things that don’t really matter, a whole lot of importance. We want the newest gadgets, the newest fashion, the hottest brand names, etc etc etc. Our social media accounts have become important to us than our relationships. Sometimes, I wonder how our world would be ten years from now. Having a relationship in this virtual world is also not easy. As a relationship columnist, I always get questions from girls about issues in their relationships and most times, it has something to do with a lack of communication. I made a list of some points to remember when you’re in a relationship:
- KEEP YOU RELATIONSHIP REAL: The only time you need to use your phone is when you call your special someone but when you’re together then spend time with each other.
- COMMUNICATE: Talk and listen to each other. Be a good listener when needed, communication is key in relationships.
- DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR EACH OTHER: make other each feel important by doing small things such as surprising each other for dinner or buying her flowers, etc.
- SPEND TIME TOGETHER: take out time out of your busy schedules to spend time with your partner.
- GIVE COMPLIMENTS: Give each other compliments. Compliments make everyone feel special and wanted.
- DRESS UP ON DATE NIGHTS: when we get too comfortable with each other, we no longer care about looking nice for each other. Dressing nice is a part of courting, it keeps the relationship “new”, it feels like you just met!
- WATCH COMEDY SHOWS: It is believed that watching funny things makes us feel more happy, more positive, and we have a better outlook on life. Watching funny things together will keep your relationship happier and positive.
- SHARE RESTAURANT BILLS: money seems to be a problem in relationships sometimes, it creates trouble so just try to split things up once in a while. Men are not obligated to pay all the time, first few dates and drinks once in a while are Ok but since nowadays women also earn as much, it’s ok to just share the bills. It keeps things simpler.
Marriages in the 21st century?
Every single day, I hear about someone getting engaged or married. I always see very fancy engagement shots on Facebook and girls picking out their wedding gowns. They all look so beautiful on their wedding day with their gorgeous outfits, over the top venues and their vows. At the same time, I also hear of marriages ending in separation and divorce just a few years after their big day. Why is that? Isn’t the famous tag line for marriage: till death do us part? I guess not! We’re exposed to just so many options than we know what to do with thesedays. We don’t make things work but just find another partner instead. Your partner is not an object, it’s a human being and humans CANNOT and SHOULD NOT be replaced.
Some trends that I’ve noticed in marriages these days are:
- It didn’t work because we got married too early and we should’ve spent more time knowing each other : you should’ve thought about this earlier
- It didn’t work because he/she changed after marriage : we all have flaws and marriage is about accepting each other for what they are
- It didn’t work because he/she cheated on me: as long as we are living, we will be attracted to other people but when you commit to a person then you should restrain from such behavior, it hurts to be cheated on and you would hate it if someone cheated on you so “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
Marriage isn’t a game or something that we purchase and can return or exchange, it’s about commitment and acceptance. I don’t suggest you live together if you hate each other’s guts but making it work a little is still a good start. If we all made some effort in maintaining our relationships now then Marriages will still exist 30 years from now. Let’s all believe in marriage and think of it in a positive manner. It can be a blessing! It’s just the way we look at it.
XOXO Paarull
If you have a relationship question that you’d like to share then – Ask Paarull at [email protected]!
