DON’T WORRY, BE HAPPY: Water Your Dreams With Optimism Not Pessimism

0
230
© A Master Media

By Balwant Sanghera

My good friend Jessie Jhooty of AAAMovies sends me a priceless quote every day. Here is one of those recent quotes: “Be careful what you water your dreams with. Water them with worry and fear and you will produce weeds that choke the life from your dream. Water them with optimism and you will cultivate success. Always be on the lookout for ways to turn a problem into an opportunity for success. Always be on the lookout for ways to nurture your dream.”

This beautiful quotation captures the essence of the difference between worry and optimism.

Worrying can be constructive, positive and good if it inspires you to accomplish something or helps you achieve a goal. However, simply worrying about something and not doing anything to address the cause of that worry can have serious negative impact on your health and well-being. Chronic worrying can have serious consequences resulting in anxiety, sleepproblems and many mental health issues. So what can we do in order to get rid of the vicious cycle of worrying. Dale Carnegie in his classic book How to Stop Worrying and Start Living has suggested a four step approach to deal with worry. First, write down the problem or what is worrying you. Once you narrow it down to a concise one or two sentence statement it helps you to focus better in resolving the issue. Second, identify the cause of the problem or whatever is worrying you. It helps you with finding a suitable solution easily. Third, brainstorm different solutions to the problem that is the cause of your worry. Finally, pick the best solution and implement it.

Another approach to get rid of your worry is also pretty close to the one mentioned above. It suggests that we should identify the cause of our worry first and set a specific time for it –say thirty minutes or so every day at a specific time. Use this time to worry productively by thinking of solutions to get rid of your worry. If a worry thought comes at any other time think of some positive experience or positive thoughts to drive the worry thought out of your mind… This way you empty the worry/fears out of your mind. Another suggestion is not to suppress your worries but accept them and move on. Another wise person has suggested that worry does not empty to-morrow of its sorrow. It empties to-day of our strength. So don’t let worry drain your energy.

Various philosophers and thinkers suggest different strategies to get rid of worry. Some suggest mindfulness, meditation and living in the moment in order to move your mind away from the negative and worrying mode to a more positive, happier and constructive one. They propose that focusing on the present moment and non-judgemental awareness of present thoughts and emotions is an excellent way to get rid of worrying and fear thoughts. Some suggest that physical exercise is an excellent way to steer yourself away from negative thoughts and towards more positive thinking. Physical movement of any kind has been reported to be an excellent way to reduce stress, anxiety and worry.

Finally, we need to admit that worrying is part of our lives. All of us have our ups and downs as we move on. At some point in life we do face very tough and worrisome situations. Rather than giving up we need to find ways and means to overcome those hardships. In times like those we need to count our blessings and be thankful for what we have rather than what we don’t have. There is an old saying that tough times don’t last but tough people do. So learn to manage worry rather than letting worry drive and control your life.

Balwant Sanghera is a retired School Psychologist and Community Activist.